I know all about nerdy teenagers, like the one I caught today. She thought I wouldn’t suspect her of stealing something because she looked so innocent, but I knew those glasses and girly skirt were just a disguise. That’s why I wasn’t surprised when I found the stolen R-rated novels in her backpack. That’s why these girls read so much. Most nerds are virgins, sure, but they are horny all the time and too shy to live out all their sexual fantasies, so they hide behind the naughtiest books they can find. When I took off her clothes to do a cavity search, her body shocked me. It’s like she had been carving it to perfection, waiting for someone to make it his, and that someone was going to be me. If she wanted to get out of trouble, she was going to bend over my desk and recreate her erotic books with me.
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